Last night, we watched Hotel Rwanda with some friends at our house. For those of you who have not heard of this movie, it tells the story of Paul, a manager of a very respected and expensive hotel and how he saves 1268 people (Hutus and Tutsis) from the genocide taking place in Rwanda.

Oh my God.

This movie was intense. It wasn't very graphic, it didn't show the massacres happening directly on screen. But it captured the intensity, the tension and one could feel death about to the creep around the corner and swallow those people whole.

After everyone left for the night, I sat on the couch and cried. And cried. And sobbed.

I cried because humans can be so cruel to one another over something so abstract. I cried because America spends billions toward our military but instead of helping people being slaughtered (as in Sudan today), we go out and start wars and breed hatred among the war-racked youth. I cried because I wouldn't have been able to be as brave as those portrayed in the movie. I cried because I pictured my husband and I being separated and shot merely because of how we were labeled. I cried for all those reasons and much more.

On a good note, though, over one million people signed the petition to save NPR and PBS, although budgets were cut and a former Republican National Commitee chairperson is now in charge, one battle has been won. But with the budget cuts, that mean NPR might not be able to send reporters to parts of the world where horrific crimes are beig committed, therefore, they won't be able to spread word about it. Anyways...

I am almost done with Spanish class and work for now. I have three more days of Spanish as well as work. I am so tired. I am looking forward to this month off so freakin' much. Please send me good thoughts as I try to survive this weekend and the last days of school.

Michelle

How is it...?

I hear so much from a certain side of the political line that the media is liberal. Come again? Uh? How is it that we are hearing nothing from the media about the downing street memo (downingstreetmemo.com) and cries for impeachment but that is all we heard when Bill's mojo spilled on Monica? Sorry for being so crass, but didn't we all hear worse when the so-called liberal news were reporting back in 1996 or so. How is it that the media isn't crying out about the 1700 deaths over a war that was so blatantly fabricated? Are we ashamed to admit that we have all been dupped? Or could another reason be, say it isn't so, that the media is not in fact liberal! Shocking! Fox Media actually sent out a memo about six or longer months ago stating which words journalists could use when describing the Iraq war...it had something to do with calling suicide bombers "insurgents" or "terrorists" and calling soldiers "freedom fighters" and a whole other load of bullshit in order to make those "patriotic folks" who watch Fox news feel better about supporting the losing war in Iraq so they can go out to the malls without feeling guilty and spend an ass-load of money on clothes they don't need made by impoverished women and children in other countries that could probably use some aid but the US is too busy fighting a war that it made up. Jesus Christ almighty! And that is not in vain but a cry for help! Since when would Jesus support a war in Iraq, this Jesus who Bush once claimed as his favorite philosopher. Who is this Jesus that Bush loves because the Jesus I know overthrew conventions and violence. The Jesus I know is love, grace, forgiveness and all about community. The only community the Bush administration knows is the one that keeps filling their pockets with blood and oil money.
And where are the dissidents? Where are the protests in the streets? What, you say there were some? Oh yes, I remember something about soldiers and police with huge guns, tear gas ready in hand for any sort of "uncontrolled protests". The fact is, the 60's did a lot for us in the way of protesting, but it also did a lot for the government who now knows that it can control protests with guns, tazers and tear gas. The last time I checked this was somewhere in the definition of a dictator state, of a fascist state.
Say it ain't so!

So, let's do what the democratic system is set up to do...let's kick the rich white men out of office who are lying to us and then beating us down when we try to do something about it. Jesus Christ, help us all.

A very bitter and cyncical...actually, no, that is not right. I am not bitter (that is a bad word put on me by those in charge in order to make me feel bad or uncomfortable about my beliefs, a justification if you will). I am hopeful and yet anrgy about being lied to so damn much and feeling like there is nothing i can do! Dammit there is! Communication and community.

Must get to Spanish homework now,
Michelle

When is creepy just too creepy?

This morning, after reading and doing stuff online, I went to the bus stop and waited for my ride for school. Then, this man of about 5'4 with sunglasses on (an overcast morning mind you), came staggering up to the bench without ever taking his eyes off of me. Okay, this I can handle, I thought. So, while he is pushing for conversation, I answer politely and continue to turn away from him in order to catch of glimspe of my long-overdue bus. He talks, questions, slides his leg over so our kneecaps are touching. Okay, this is getting a little weird, I say to myself. But then again, I am a weirdo magnet and have handled situations like this before. Finally, my bus arrives. But as I get up to flag it down, so does he. Shit! I say under my breath. Then, he holds out his hand,. Whew, a handshake is no prob. Then he spreads out his arms inviting me into a hug...into a very very creepy hug in which he puts his nose into the crevice of my neck and inhales very loudly and very very deeply. Instantly, I pull away while he mutters something to me in Spanish as I leap from five feet away from the curb into the bus. Once seated on the bus as it moves safely away from Mr. Creep-o, I proceed to attack my neck with the back of my hand as if removing an unwanted bug or goosebumps that might be contaminated.

What in the hell?!!

I didn't ask for my neck to be inhaled! Nor for a hug. Damn, I pretty much ignored him the whole time except for my short responses. So, I wondered as I rode the bus to school, fighting the feeling that I had been violated in some weird way, how do I tell creeps to go off and shove it? It seems to me that a creep is a creep and will always be so, therefore, nothing i can do will work. It will either A) edge him/her on B)make him/her pissed and only retaliate or C) they will transform into gigantic cockroaches and eat my head.

Yuck. Reliving that whole story made me feel naseous again.

On a plus side, I am making an A in my spanish class. Only two more weeks left!

Michelle